What to Give Your Valentine If They Work at an Agency

Let’s face it. The agency world is full of characters and wowing them on Valentine’s Day can be challenging, even painful. Whether they’re acutely aware of being “sold to” and always reject traditional V-day gifts, hate the color red because of a recent campaign, or just don’t like how anyone else does anything, you’re pretty much going to get the wrong thing or plan the wrong evening. Don’t fear, my dear. We’re giving some tips to help you get through the big day:  

As you probably already know, if your Valentine is a Creative, you’re screwed. They will redesign your card in their head and want to undo your cheesy gift. Thinking of giving flowers? They will be the wrong color and the wrong layout—no matter what. Don’t even buy a card for a Copywriter because they will hate what it says. Making/writing your own is the stupidest thing you could ever do. 

What to do: If you insist on flowers, find a bouquet that a famous designer created, give it to your Valentine, mention the designer by name and say it’s his latest work. Print out an Instagram of you two and write, “I love you” on it. Go to a restaurant no one’s ever heard of in Bushwick.  

If you’re dating, or worse, married to a Producer, any dinner you arrange will be poorly planned, poorly scoped and completely over budget. The timing of the gift will be wrong, wrong, wrong. 

What to do: Let them plan it. Let them. Ask for an agenda beforehand and follow it exactly. Ask for a wish list. Stick to the list. Pay for dinner. Tip precisely twenty percent.

If you’re with a developer, I would consider getting them nothing and just let them play video games for as long as they want. 

If you’re unclear about the last statement, write or print the words, “This is a certificate that entitles you to play video games for as long as you want on Valentine’s Day. Love, [Name]”. It doesn’t matter what it looks like. 

Are you snuggling up to a New Business guy or gal this February 14th? This crew really, really wants the night to be a success. Which sometimes gets in the way of the night being a success. 

What to do: Let them win. Take them to a place where they can win and let them. This could be a bowling alley, one of those adult arcade places, or a casino. Hell, you could even arm wrestle all night as long as they’re winning. 

That about sums it up. Just remember, love can conquer (almost) any quirk. Have fun and have a Happy Valentine’s Day.