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Alex Shifrin: My 2020 Predictions

The Influencers 354 Add to collection

INFLUENCER: LP/AD president predicts more Ryan Reynolds love and another Tesla stunt in the new year

Alex Shifrin: My 2020 Predictions

As the end of 2019 approaches, it's that time to look forward to a new and exciting decade. Below is my list of predictions of what to expect from 2020, in no particular order:

Celebrity Death. A celebrity over the age of 55 will die. People over 40 will post existential reflections on Facebook. 

Celebrity Death II. A celebrity under the age of 21 will die. People under 21 will post tributes on TikTok. Cardi B will Tweet about it. Someone will comment about her grammar. 

US Politics. The President of the United States will say something that will outrage some people. Some other people will criticise those outraged by his comments. For a brief period, the hashtag #liberalsnowflakecuck will trend. 

Corporate Bankruptcy. A long-time business will go under. The digital economy will be blamed for this.

Corporate Bankruptcy II. A digital economy business will go under. Unfair practices by long-time business incumbents will be blamed for this.

Ryan Reynolds. Ryan Reynolds will once again capture the hearts of the online community by doing/saying something irreverent. AdAge and TechCrunch will approve. A reddit thread will emerge arguing that he is no longer relevant. Ryan Reynolds will appear on that tread and agree, sparking further approval.

Drake. Drake will drop a new single. It will sound hauntingly similar to a previous single. No one will notice. Canadians will approvingly 'woop' whenever the single comes on in a club.

Tesla. Tesla will make news as a result of some stunt. The stunt will be heavily debated. Elon Musk will take great pride in telling the advertising industry that he did this in spite of the advertising industry. Those comments will be heavily debated, creating a PR infinity loop. The PR infinity loop will somehow inspire Tesla to design a self-regenerating battery, thereby perfecting perpetual motion. The technology will be heavily debated. 

Apple. Apple will release iOS 13.4.5b. All previously purchased adapters, hardware and app settings will no longer function and will require re-purchasing and upgrades. Apple’s loyal customers will update their hardware and apps. Someone will create an Instagram post chronicling Apple’s changing adapters. Someone will comment about the grammar of that post.

Cormac McCarthy. A producer will attempt to finally start pre-production on a script of Cormac McCarthy’s 'Blood Meridian'. Shortly afterwards, this idea will be abandoned, and the book will once again be proclaimed un-filmable. In an interview, James Franco will re-affirm his intent to make this happen. 

5G. 5G will universally roll out across North America. Mobile operators will be very excited. Some will buy airtime to announce that they were the first to do it. People in North American will largely not notice how this impacts their ability to stay current on the latest political outrage. Sometime the following year, a 5G advertisement featuring Ryan Reynolds will be nominated for a Clio Award. 

Hats. People will wear more hats. As a result of this trend, multiple competing hat sharing apps will emerge. One of them will be called a unicorn. This will be heavily debated. 

That's it. Happy New Year!

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LP/AD, Tue, 17 Dec 2019 09:16:44 GMT